Monday, September 25, 2006

do be do

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"to do is to be" - Nietzsche


"to be is to do" - Kant


"do be do be do" - Sinatra


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Posted by nidya at Monday, September 25, 2006

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Tuesday, September 19, 2006

chickened

UoM. Also known as my school of revealing

as far as a degree in growing up goes. but as part of the

academic service i had a resume review a month ago.

They looked at it, told me whats good and what needed

improvements, plus a good luck wish.

Paid $7.5 i didnt complain, wanted to have the best resume

i can offer job market late this year onwards.

If only i could manipulate some of my history to enter the contest.


A contest. A handful of graduates get in

while plentiful stay in the waiting room. How i wish to be welcomed.

but let me face it: im not as good as i thought i was,

and my resumes weak. I could do so much better.

Thats the way it always goes though, right? I could do better.

a convenient way to look back, a devastating one too.


So i dont know how to be ready.

i can sneer and glare and say that life is so unfair.

want to believe that those who made it, made it cos their

breasts were really big. But i dont wanna get old before i have to.

get bitter and bitch about those who succeed. So perhaps im ready,

but pretending not to because its just a cozier place to be.


and lately i am bitter. so let everything looks dark too.

like vegemite. licorice. burnt toast. and thinking about accountant

in this dark hours, its not the sexiest profession really.


it is my excuse to dress in power suit
, wear power glasses,

carry power laptop, sit power solitude and drink power coffee.

apparently little nidya wants to fit in her little world, powerfully.

but wait, this is sad and contains only little truth.

but even so, why does my resume still sleep on the desk, unsent?

what other reasons can make me finally do it, really..

Save the world?

Posted by nidya at Tuesday, September 19, 2006

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Tuesday, September 05, 2006

green tea

Its time to bring winter to a close.

It has ended gracefully and spring begins along with the riot

of fresh green buds. I began winter just few months ago in

a tram number 16 up to the city, full of uncertainties.

I end it here in the kitchen, with cheerios in my mouth and

a toaster standing nearby. Its raining outside.

Must be a little goodbye drizzle.


Ive never missed the sun before I met winter.

Not this much. I used to ask You to turn it dimmer so I could

walk freely under. Its the Asian in me. And as much as I love

the orange maroon brown alliance in autumn, or take pleasure

in pumpkin soup, beef gravy and warm double blankets

in winter, I welcome September in glee and looking up to the sky.

Reminded how colors are extraordinary.


That the trees and flowers and grass didnt die when

they claimed so. They just took their time to be appreciated again.

Nature is terribly humble in dealing with my ignorance.


Many things are still full of uncertainties since winter.

Havent shifted much less. But a little bit of sadness is a very

healthy thing, or so Ive learnt. Maybe I want to take time too,

just to appreciate things more.




but hey dearest spring

tell the world Im still up for living

although sometimes I do absolutely nothing

but eating green tea ice cream in your evening

Posted by nidya at Tuesday, September 05, 2006

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